08 June 2011

I'm in One of Those Moods

I hate to write two complainy posts back-to-back, but I write about what's bouncing around in my head and, well, this is what's bouncing around in my head.

I love my blog. I vividly remember the day I first learned about blogs and the day I decided to start one and the day I started one. Silly, I know, but true.

But lately, I'm finding myself not writing posts for fear of hurting feelings or upsetting someone. Grr.

For example, I recently wrote on my blog about wanting something. Someone got me one of those somethings, but it wasn't exactly what I wanted. It was nice. It was thoughtful. I appreciated it. But it wasn't perfect, so I kept looking for the perfect thing. A few weeks later, I was given the perfect thing. We're talking fancy dancy, state-of-the-art, I-feel-bad-for-accepting-this perfect. I so badly want to share a photo of that thing, but how can I without addressing the other not-perfect, but-still-really-nice thing? Am I over thinking this? Using too many hyphens? I'd be writing from a place of honesty and happiness, not cruelty, but still, I'm afraid to hurt gift giver A's feelings if I write about gift giver B's gift. Again I say, grr.

It's spells like these that make me serious consider starting a secret blog. Except I love comments. (Insert shout out to all my commenters, old and new, known and unknown, here and on Facebook links: I love you!)

I have lots of examples like the one above of things I want to write about, but can't. How about the time I went that one place and loved it, but can't write about it because then someone or someones would get mad that I a) didn't invite them or b) didn't see them while I was near that one place or c) never call.

See how hard it is to be a blogger? How do you handle these situations?


Wendy said...

You used the word complainy. That made me laugh.

I censor myself too ... and I think it's just part of being a blogger, a nice blogger. There's a lot of family or work or friend situations I'd love to write about just to vent them out, but I know someone would take offense, so I don't.

A secret blog would be a great idea!

Written Permission said...

Yep, I've had to censor myself more than once because I didn't want to blow up someone's (or my) spot at work, or I didn't want to make one friend mad at another. And now my in-laws have the internets, so all bets are off. :)

It sucks. But the alternative of dealing with everyone's crap would suck more.

Ky • twopretzels.com said...

Oy - I hear you loud and clear.

From the beginning, I always had the idea that I wanted my blog to be light and airy. I went into it never having any intention of giving too much of myself away with it -- I don't like to be too self-indulgent.

Since then, I've happily and occasionally mentioned my spiritual and political beliefs and of course, talked about my children/marriage... BUT, I keep it light. (I'm struggling with whether to continue Lila Lunes right now...)

I have especially noticed that I censor myself ONLY when it comes to family. For example, there is a post that I really, really, REALLY want to write but I know it will straight piss off my sister. SO... I may just journal it elsewhere.

If I had a secret blog - I'd write it there.

But, I do respect that some things just need to be kept private.

I have this struggle about twitter and facebook, too. I'll be having a strong emotion about something (kid is driving me crazy or something) and my thought is, "I"ll tweet that." Then I'm like, "What??? Why are you tweeting this?! This is YOUR business, no one else's? And do you want your legacy to be all complaints? Do I need to share EVERYTHING?"

So, yeah. To say I struggle with this as well, is an understatement.

Amber said...

I think part of my problem is that while I love comments and love knowing that people read what I write, I do this for me. I do this to chronicle my life. To share with my friends and family. To have something to look back on. And, sometimes, to vent.

So, if I'm doing it for me, why am I so worried about everyone else?

Sassytimes said...

I feel this way quite often. I know I have a lot of lurkers...sometimes I want/need to vent about things, but I'm pretty sure they read and don't want to hurt their feelings. Just need to vent.

I actually started a secret blog and it really did help for venting situations, but I agree, it wasn't as 'fun' with no comments.

wrestling kitties said...

I hear you too! It is usually pretty obvious when I have some thing on my mind that I want to blog about but feel I shouldn't...because then I just don't blog and become frustrated.

I WISH my blog could be more political or about religion or talk about more personal stuff because sometimes that is just what needs to be said, but I avoid it or just generalize it because I don't want to hurt feelings.

I don't know though how much I would blog in a private blog, but there are times where I want to say stuff really bad and have to keep my mouth shut because of people I know who read my blog....or even those who I may not yet know they read it.

Angie said...

Hey Amber, I have an idea. Why don't we start a private blog? For all those who need that venting place away from family and friends. I too have my blog, as you know, and I know I started it to share with family and friends the happenings with the kids, but I find myself wanting/needing to type out loud more often; especailly about the kids but mostly about family. The blog can have multiple authors. In fact, I'm sure it can be set up that the authors have to be invited or something like that. Anyway, for what's its worth. I don't know how many times I started a private blog and never followed through with it because there was no one on the other end listening.